Can You Move Past Being Stuck on Someone and Into a Stronger Relationship?
You’ve been staring at her with that sick puppy-dog look for too long.
You can’t help but noticing her every single habit, what time she goes to the copy machine, where she goes on her lunch break, even the way in which she checks her nails.
If she catches your eye while passing in the hallway, you’re elated for days. If you overhear her laughing into her cell phone and murmuring a male name, you feel like tearing your hair out and moving to another city. This has got to stop.
Welcome to the world of infatuation
Infatuation, quite simply, is being stuck on someone. Some people mistake it for love, they move from relationship to relationship as soon as their infatuation with a person wanes.
Infatuation is not a bad thing in and of itself, but it should only be temporary. Infatuation is a stage, it should not be a condition. If you stay infatuated too long, you can find that your infatuation will begin to affect your life in negative ways.
How to Know if You Are Infatuated?
- You felt a passionate desire to be with the person with whom you are infatuated.
- You experience the “High and Low” syndrome, or mood swings depending on how the person you are infatuated with responds.
- You find yourself daydreaming about her.
- You feel a hungry feeling when you are away from her.
- You feel incomplete and lonely when she is far away.
- You need constant reassurance from her.
- Your life becomes focused on her. You may even change your life to accommodate her.
- You live in constant fear of rejection or abandonment.
- You feel a deep need for your feelings to be returned by her.
If you feel like you have been down this path before, you know how it ends
Either you confront the woman with your feelings of love and face her possible rejection, or you wither away with your unresolved feelings until you can’t stand it anymore and take steps to avoid seeing her anymore.
Don’t worry if you easily become infatuated
You get to experience the highs that many other more sensible people don’t get to experience. You see the wonder in many women, and women will find themselves attracted to you due to the force of your feelings towards them. However, you may also find yourself moving ceaselessly from one woman to another, seeking to maintain that high of infatuation. Don’t let the need for infatuation blind you to the benefits of quieter, deeper, more enduring love.
When the intensity of infatuation naturally fades, your emotions will dampen down
You may feel as if you have fallen out of love. You haven’t–you’ve just fallen out of infatuation. The best part is ahead. Now you will be more realistic about what you and your partner have to offer one another. You’ll begin to develop deeper intimacy based on respect and understanding of the other person. You may discover that the solid ground of a loving relationship is better than the high and insecurity of dating the object of your infatuation for the first time.
If you are stuck in infatuation, remember the following: Infatuation is just a stage, not a condition
Move on. If you haven’t asked the girl out yet, do so. Let her response give you the only answer you need: yes or no. If the answer is no, move on.
Infatuation can be a fun rollercoaster ride, but the ultimate goal is still ahead: enduring, deep romantic love.
Infatuation wears blinkers. A healthy dose of reality about the girl you are infatuated with can go a long way in curing you, or giving you the courage you need to ask her out.
Don’t do anything you’ll later regret
Infatuation can be an intoxication. You may feel as if you’ll go to any lengths to win the object of your infatuation. Take a moment to remember the cardinal rule of dating: acting like a puppy dog won’t get you the girl.