Is The Love in Your Relationship Uneven or Unfair?
I can feel how you are when you go through this…
If your effort of love does not come back to you, how do you change your guy so he does love you back?
It’s a tough question with an even tougher reply: Don’t expect to get back what you give in a relationship.
Now, I can hear you already getting ready to move on and not read the rest of this, but you won’t be doing yourself any favors by clicking away quite yet.
Yes, relationships are supposed to be a two-way street.
Relationships should be about equality between the two partners, give and get the same for each.
But the reality is that often women give much more than the man does and this happens because of the distinct differences between men and women:
- men are logical
- women are emotional
And it’s this basic difference that becomes a widening gorge in any relationship.
Because men don’t need to receive “emotional support’ the same way that women do, men are not emotional to their lovers equally.
And the same is true for men, because men are logical they give logic to their partners even if that is not what the woman needs at that time.
Have you ever just wanted to spend “some quality time” with your man. And he agrees, watches you for a while, holds you a while, then, maybe 15 or 30 minutes later asks permission to go and do something else?
Have you ever needed to just “talk something through” because you have an issue outside of your relationship and all your man can do is offer you “fix it” advice instead of the emotional support you really need?
Why can’t a guy just listen?
This goes beyond men not understanding women, this goes to the very depth of the answer: why are men and women so different?
Hold on for a second, we’re not going down that road in this article… but we will talk more about why he doesn’t love you as you love him.
Because men are logical they don’t see the need to “be with you” as much as they need to know that you are not “in need of something to be fixed”.
Men need to instinctively “provide” for you but only in the physical sense, not in the emotional sense.
A man feels “joy” when he accomplishes something that is good for himself and his “group” (whether this be his partner or hanging out with other men), joy is not something men usually feel as being needed to be felt emotionally.
Even sexually, a man understands his part of the act but doesn’t fully understand what a woman’s part is from a woman’s perspective.
Why doesn’t your guy love you like you love him?
Maybe he hasn’t yet been shown what love truly is. Maybe you expect to much of him at this point of your relationship.
It’s quite likely that your guy just doesn’t yet understand the love you have for him.
And it will take patience and understanding to bring him to the same emotional love place you are in.
Step one: patience with him
Step two: don’t pressure him, guy’s prefer the race not the finale
Step three: show him love as best you can, without pointing out that you are doing “this’ because you love him and he should do something also to show you that he loves you too
Step four: love yourself in the emotional sense, and the self-confidence you have will infect your man with love
It’s time to learn methods to communicate with your man in a completely different and loving way; how to redesign your relationship dynamics whether this is your marriage, your dating time, or even before your first date.
Understanding comes only from experience.
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